Aquarius Season:

COVID, Cohorts and Your House of Common Cause (11th house)

Let’s talk about friends. What a strange world it is, making friends as an adult. Even stranger, is the skill it takes to make new friends as a mother, because some friendships become somewhat encouraged by your child’s natural friendships, and some get harder if your kids don’t exactly sync in personality, age or even school district. 

I will say as a mom of 5 ranging in ages from 15 to 2, the ages where friendships feel necessitated by your kids’ friends is a short one, mostly lasting in the grade school days, because, lets face it, your baby and toddler will hang with pretty much whoever, and once your kid is old enough to be dropped off for play dates, well, you don’t have to be friends with the other kid’s mom, just “friendly”… But, back to where we started. They say, “it takes a village,” but they never say where that village is, or how to get there. 

What a strange world it is, making friends as an adult. Even stranger, is the skill it takes to make new friends as a mother.

When I had my first baby I was very young, living in Manhattan where the average age for most mothers is 35 – I was over a decade younger than that. My now husband and I were unmarried at the time and so, ringless and young I was often mistaken for the nanny and so many of my promising initial playground conversations turned to awkward encounters where I was being questioned about my “full-time status with the family I worked for”… needless to say that never led to many follow-up play dates. 

My husband tried to introduce me to the wife of a friend of his; she was a good 13 years older and after a double date to dinner where I confessed that most of my friends were still out barhopping and I really didn’t have any mom friends at all and I was SO LONELY, she kindly sponsored me to join the HRPMamas – and it opened up the world – the first world – of social media moms to me. Facebook was barely a thing then, Instagram wasn’t even born at that point, and here was this PLACE (on email) where OTHER MOMS WERE and I HAD ACCESS TO THEM. I was so grateful and thus started my journey of mom-friending. 

We’ve moved a bunch over the years and having a number of kids spanning the ages has allowed me to curate some invaluable and unbelievably close friends in a number of different places, but I always felt a little out-of-place in the area where we seemed to always return to settle, here in New Jersey. But I eventually found a group of unique, entrepreneurial, independent, strong, tolerant, intelligent, kind, international women and it has made such a difference for me. For most of them, their oldest is my fourth’s age, but it doesn’t seem to make a difference, and we all have this fluid connection that feels easy and respectful.

[Having a group of friends nearby] was always something I felt like I needed. Not wanted, but something that my soul really called out for. But why?

During some of my lonelier times my husband would encourage me by saying, “You have me, you have your college friends, and close friends around the country… and you’ll always have us, you don’t need a group of friends nearby.” But it was always something I felt like I needed. Not wanted, but something that my soul really called out for. But why? So… here’s why knowing where your 11th house is in your chart and how it can help you understand yourself as a social being. The 11th house, rules our friendships, is our house that bridges us to the collective and common cause. It’s where we connect outwardly. 

[Finding] a group of unique, entrepreneurial, independent, strong, tolerant, intelligent, kind, international women… has made such a difference for me.

I’m a Libra and my Sun (my life force) lives in my 11th house. Ruled by Aquarius this double airy match up puts a VERY strong emphasis on the social connections in my life. I like to create and spearhead social events (even better if they have a humanitarian side to them!) and share the fun with the people I enjoy the most. Like any good Libra I’m always seeking balance so it’s no surprise that my close social group is equally represented by all four of the elements – air, water, fire and earth. With Libra ruling my 11th house I bring an intimacy, depth and loyalty to my friendships too; I’m all in as a friend; there’s very little that will be flaky about my approach to socializing with the people who are in my close group. And I really only want a close group; I don’t have interest in surface friendships (how Libra/Sun/11th house is THAT!?).

For me personally, [with my sun in the 11th house] my social expression is a necessity, and in order for me to be healthy, I need connection… I’m [also] always seeking balance, so it’s no surprise that my close social group is equally presented across all four of the elements – air, water, fire and earth.

For me personally, my social expression is a necessity, and in order for me to be healthy I need connection. COVID has been really hard and we have been fortunate to have a great group of like-minded families we’ve been able to cohort with. This has allowed us and our children to have a semblance of normalcy here and there, where we can create some “normal” feeling experiences.

Knowing that social connection was vital for my wellbeing was so important for me to understand and to be able to communicate to my husband and navigate this difficult time. Creating compassion and empathy around things I was struggling with and knowing where the feelings came from made them much easier to address. As I always say, astrology doesn’t change what is, but it does confirm what is and give you valuable insight that can prepare you to make healthier and better choices and understand where your needs are coming from. 

Creating compassion and empathy around the things I was struggling with and knowing where the feelings came from made them much easier to address.

Where is your 11th house? What rules your 11th house? What planets reside there? What house falls under Aquarius for you? What planets reside there?

There is SO much information available to you to understand the nature of your social being and needs. What would you like to know!?

xo

Rebecca

On Tool Kits, Superpowers, Aspects and Planetary Placements

We have 5 kids, but it wasn’t until our 3rd that we experienced a Mickey Mouse kick. Milo, our now 7 year old, loved Mickey Mouse Club for about 6 months during his toddler years, which, as any parent knows, feels like a century. “It’s the Mickey Mouse clubhouse! Come inside it’s fun inside!” That song literally haunted my dreams.

But there was one section that I always found particularly interesting. In each episode, there was a challenge the characters had to sort out, and they had a bag of 4 tools they took with them: 3 they identified and one mystery tool.

As they proceeded on their adventure and were met with a hiccup, they’d turn to their big bag of “Mouseketools” and choose the best tool for the job. Flat tire, air pump. Lost cow, rope. Broken gate, hammer. And so on. If none of the obvious choices worked, or if they had all been used, you could call upon the “Mystery Mouseketool” and no matter the situation, it would always be the perfect fit for the job. That Mickey always had all the luck! 

We are responsible for creating the difficult situations in our lives because that’s how we grow.

Now, I believe the challenges in our lives are predestined. We come with karma and we manifest it. We are responsible for creating the difficult situations in our lives because that’s how we grow. The soul knows this.

The way we react to them are somewhat ingrained in us, and it’s our job to learn from the patterns in our reactions and to evolve from them: to grow into higher versions of ourselves. In short, life happens, we react and we learn to react better over time. 

The best part? Much like good ol’ Mickey, we came with the exact tools in our toolbox that we need to get through the journey we’re on. Only, their uses are not quite as “hit-you-over-the-head” – we need to get creative and use them the right way.

I’ve found through my work as an astrologer, that people usually want one of three things or a combination: to be seen, understood and forgiven.

I’ve learned through my work as an astrologer, that people usually want one of three things, or a combination: to be seen, understood and forgiven.

Or, more often, be seen, understood and then given permission to forgive themselves and usually for things they aren’t even responsible for. Literally they want permission to forgive themselves for personal qualities that came inherently and intrinsicly woven into their nature.

They’re emotional, they’re talkative, they’re ambitious, they’re analytical… whatever it is, somewhere along the way, someone important, or many people who weren’t important, told them these qualities were “wrong” or “bad” and now, after however many years of feeling broken and being incapable of changing (because to rid yourself of these things is no easier than changing your skin color, or your height) they come looking for someone to tell them it’s ok to be emotional. It’s ok to be ambitious. It’s ok to be talkative and analytical and all the other things that are as normal and natural as the 5 feet 5 inches tall they stand, or the freckles on their nose, or their double jointed-ness. This is how you came, darling. And it’s perfect. We need you just as you are.

It’s ok to be ambitious. It’s ok to be talkative and analytical and all the other things… This is how you came… And it’s perfect. We need you just as you are.

So when I meet you, I look at your planetary placements and you learn how to fall in love with yourself. And then we look at your aspects and understand where your strengths and challenges are, and we map out ideas around how to cope and manage your trending patterns. The chart reflects yourself back, and we can actually sit and look and see the beauty and the plan, not from a place of judgement, but a place of curiosity, of seeking.

The chart reflects yourself back, and we can actually sit and look and see the beauty and the plan, not from a place of judgement, but a place of curiosity, of seeking.

These things are your tool kit, they are the weapons you’ll use on this journey where you’ll weather many battles, and if you don’t know how to use them, they’ll be useless to you in these challenges. Astrology is like a specialized training class.

If you see them as inefficiencies, as weaknesses instead of resources, you won’t know how to weild them to your advantage. You’ll underestimate their power, their strength. They’ll get rusty, and clunky and jammed up. 

We have to accept and embrace the things that came here with us and maximize these gifts. The universe doesn’t make mistakes.

We have to accept and embrace the things that came here with us and maximize these gifts. The universe doesn’t make mistakes – there’s always balance – especially when you know where to look for it.

Remember, it’s like Mickey. The surprise tool always magically works, because the Universe wants you to succeed, you have to believe it, and when you reach for that Mystery Magic Tool, you bet your bottom dollar it will be the right one for the job.

xo

Rebecca